One of the I reasons I resonate so deeply to Mary's response: and she "treasured up all these things and pondered them in her heart," is I have learned, professionally and personally, that the treasures of our heart and what we ponder determines virtually all of our living.
Many years ago my professional life involved understanding what makes human beings 'tick.' The majority of this professional life was working in churches but I also worked in the field of alcoholism and drug recovery. Either way what I learned was that we human beings are an awfully lot like squirrels: we continually scrounge around for fallen 'nuts' and hide them away in a secret cache, which is 'to treasure up.'
Like squirrels who hoard found nuts, what we fill our 'cache' with becomes our food for living. Being human rather than a squirrel means we are complex beings created with the ability to choose which nuts to leave behind and which to hoard. The ego-self, which is concerned with looking good and surviving comfortably, tends to seek nuggets proving our worth to the world, our pride of possession or titles, fortune, fame or just plain living up to cultural standards of 'looking good.' Unfortunately, these 'treasures' do not offer many nutrients for the soul and tend to intensify the ego's fear of loss.
What I also know is that we cannot get rid of our ego: if you're human and functioning you're going to have an ego. Therefore the intention is not to get rid of our ego, but to have it become the servant rather than the master of our living. God apparently knew this for God created us as complex beings. Yes, the ego-self is real but so too are our heart and our spirit. When balanced, all three components of being human function toward wholeness.
The only thing I know of that is stronger than the ego-self as master, is the Spirit of God's love and Goodness: the intention therefore is to feed the heart and Spirit so they become larger and larger and the ego-self thinner and thinner. All you really need for living is a thin, permeable skin of an ego-self.
The picture above is a rocking chair overlooking some beautiful scenery. The image evokes a sense of stillness and peace. I chose this image because I know the way of enlarging the heart so it opens and expands to receive the Spirit of God's goodness, is to create a time of stillness every day dedicated to this single intention. Stillness is absolutely essential to allowing our inmost self to awaken.
Our essential spirit - the inmost self God created to live in our heart - when first aroused is a timid creature; it shies away from noise and activity and easily becomes wary and skittish. Unless it feels safe, it will fold itself into a protective cocoon. In the cocoon it remains alive but becomes dormant and unavailable for our living. Once awakened, like a newly born infant it needs to be held close and rocked to the beating of our heart. This time of rocking our Spirit in stillness is where we, like Mary, become able to treasure up the goodness of God; we count our blessings, we recall the miracles of living and we ponder the mystery of God unfolding in our life.
And what you may ask does all this have to do with this tiny season of 12 days leading us to Epiphany? Well, there are two stories happening here in this little season. One story is of new life being born within our heart . New life is uncomfortable; boggling our preconceived notions and upsetting routines of thought and feeling. Tending new life requires holding it closely to our body, rocking gently and singing it lullabies of love. The other story is of the Wise Men who left all that defined them (the ego-self) in order to follow a star and bring both the gifts of their heart and the great affirmation of what the birth in that stable in Bethlehem meant to the world.
Birthing new life (Mary's story) and living the truth of our 'inmost self' (the Wise Men's story) requires a heart that has come alive with God's Spirit of love and goodness. The first step toward God's Spirit being alive and real within our heart is the simple step of creating space: we choose to spend some time each day in stillness and open ourselves in gratitude to God.
The lines from a poem I shared a couple weeks ago keep running through my mind: "make in my heart a mystic place, of self and sin swept bare. Where I may look upon Thy face and talk with Thee in prayer."
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